I’ve spent most of today trying to get back to editing Pictures of Love while watching the snow get steadily thicker outside. I need to monitor the snow to make sure it doesn’t get so heavy we can’t get to nursery to pick the kids up.

I took them out in the snow before we left this morning, in case it doesn’t hang around, and they were ready to come in after five minutes. They prefer a nice deep muddy puddle or a warm sandy beach I think. Daddy’s going to be disappointed – he’s desperate for them to be able to put their own gloves on so we can all go skiing.

It’s been hard getting back to Pictures of Love. I know it so well now I am truly sick of reading it (hence why the first chapters are so much more polished than the last. This is the fifth time I’ve sat down to edit it and I don’t think I’ve made it to the end once). My boredom makes me think I should just bin it and accept it’s never going to fly.

Somehow I can’t do that.

It isn’t just all the hours that have gone into writing it. It’s more the ‘not giving up’ ethos that I know goes with being a writer. Who am I to say it’s awful? Anything that’s familiar becomes ordinary no matter how beautiful it may appear to someone else.

I recently got back the critique of the first chapter I paid for as part of a competition and it was surprisingly enthusiastic. I’ve had the first chapter critiqued before and they basically tore it to shreds, finding nothing to commend it. I’m okay with criticism but you’ve got to have something to build on! This time, though, it was praised for its strong voice and humour – things I was worried it didn’t have.

So I’m not giving up, just plod-plodding along. I’ve decided to send out some query letters – the novel isn’t ready to be self-published so I may as well fill the time somehow. At least I know the first three chapters are polished! (By the way, how bloomin’ long does it take to write query letters and find people to send them to! I can’t believe how many hours I can lose and still only send one query…)

Enough rambling. Here is the latest installment of the YHA Novel.

_____________________________________________________________________________

“Claire, over here!”

Claire looked round the half-empty pub for a familiar face but nothing jumped out. She was casting her gaze back across the bar when she saw a hand waving from a dark corner.

“Kim, there you are.” Claire made her way through stools and tables to reach her friend. “Your hair! My God, I didn’t recognise you.”

She bent over to kiss her friend’s cheek before sliding in next to her. Her eyes fixed on the bright red points sticking up from her Kim’s head. “I don’t know what’s more dramatic, the colour or the spikes.”

“I know, wicked isn’t it? Mum hates it…” She giggled like a little girl.

“Kim, you’re not sixteen anymore you know: pissing off your mum doesn’t need to be your primary concern.” She laughed, but in truth she was shocked. Kim’s hair had always been a beautiful blonde. It was the reason they met.

Claire remembered it, even now. She had crossed the playground on their first day at primary school and asked if she could touch Kim’s hair. It had been soft, like a fairy princess’s. Claire had tugged at her own thick brown locks in disgust. Now Claire stroked her dark straight hair and marvelled at her friend’s bravery.

“Oh I didn’t do it just to annoy Mum, although that’s always fun. No, I’m in a play, it’s part of the costume.”

“Is it a wig?”

“Nah, they offered one but where’s the fun in that?”

Claire laughed at her friend. “Shall I get drinks?”

Kim nodded. It was an unspoken rule between them that Claire got the drinks. Kim had been an actress since University and had yet to secure anything that paid more than a pittance, while Claire’s work had always been well remunerated.

“So, what’s the play?”

“Midsummer Night’s Dream. I’m playing puck.”

“Hey, that’s great. I thought puck was normally a boy?”

Kim smiled cheekily, looking every inch the playful character. “There’s no ‘normally’ in Shakespeare. You’ve got to remember they were all originally played by men.”

“Talking of men, how’s yours?”

Kim flushed and grinned. “Hot, hard, handsome.”

Claire felt a pain under her rib cage at the look on her friend’s face. Kim had been engaged to her fiancé Jeff for two years. They were waiting for more affluent circumstances before they got married. The girls hadn’t seen each other for months, not since Michael, although they were linked on Facebook. Claire tensed, waiting for Kim to start the twenty questions. She stared at her drink then flicked her eyes up to her friend’s pale pixie face.

“Your mum told me you were starting a new assignment.” Kim gazed at Claire over her glass and they shared a look which said they knew what wasn’t being discussed. Claire smiled gratefully then took a gulp of her G&T before taking in what Kim had said.

“Mum said that? Blimey, I thought she never listened to a word I said. Wonders never cease.”

“So, come on, what’s the assignment? What drags you out of Manchester mid-week to visit folks and old friends? Not that you rang me…” She raised an eyebrow in mock censure.

“Sorry Kim, my head’s been all over the place. I only decided last night that I was going to come home today.” Claire paused, trying to decide how much to say. Even though they had known each other for over two decades, she and Kim hadn’t been close all that time. When Claire had been sent to public school the girls had drifted apart. They’d got back in touch during their University years and caught up for drinks when Claire was in Cambridge, which wasn’t often.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Kim didn’t sound put-out, just genuinely as if she didn’t want to press her friend for information. Claire thought about the people at AJC she had regarded as friends. Maybe there’s more to friendship than sharing a taste in shoes and handbags. And hairstyles, she added, glancing at the pillar-box red locks shining above Kim’s face.

“They’re trying to make me resign.” It was the first time Claire had said it out loud as if it were fact. She was gratified to see the horror on Kim’s face.

“How? Why?”

“The how is easy, I’m not so sure about the why.” Claire took a deep breath before launching into the tale of her last few weeks, right up to buying her new boots. She angled her foot out from under the table. “Gorgeous aren’t they?”

“I’d rather have the £130 quid!” Kim laughed. “I could buy some fake Uggs for a tenner and pay two weeks rent with the rest.” She let her cheeks fall into an approximation of a serious expression. “So, you’re taking on the assignment then?”

Claire hadn’t told Kim about her Maldives plan. She didn’t want Kim to think of her as a quitter. “Yes, I’ll be driving up to Berwick on Friday.”

“Wow, you’re so brave. That’s about as far out your comfort zone as me putting on tights and heels and tip-tapping into your office to sit at your desk.” She grinned at the mental image and mimed typing at a computer. “Would it suit me?”

Claire laughed too, feeling some of the tension leave her face and shoulders. “You’d be brilliant. You could give Polly, Molly and Sally a run for their money.”

“What are they, the office cats?”

“In a manner of speaking.”

“Make sure you stay in touch. I don’t get to see much of the country unless it’s the inside of a theatre. Post pictures.”

“That’s part of the assignment. Not that I’ve given it much thought. I suppose I’d better think of a blog name, a Twitter handle, all that bollocks.” She took another swig of G&T. “What should it be? My boss is trying to hound me out?”

“How about Posh Girl Goes Camping?” Kim sniggered. “Not that it’s anything like camping. Most of the rooms are en-suite these days.”

“How about Around England in Thirty Starbucks?” Claire thought about her budget. “Not that I’ll be able to afford them anymore.

“Have Helly Hansons, will travel?”

“Now you’re being silly! No, nothing’s really grabbing me.”

“You’re an Advertising Guru, surely you can think of something?”

Claire sighed. “Apparently I’m not a very good one. Advertising is all about promotion, but who wants to read about my slumming it in hostels for a whole year? I bet Coca Cola had nothing to do with it, it’s all just a sham cooked up by Carl.”

“What if it isn’t though?” Kim looked thoughtful. “I mean, Coca Cola, that’s huge. A horrid Corporate conglomerate peddling a disgusting unhealthy drink but, in your world, it’s big cheese. It might be your chance to get your revenge on your stupid boss.”

Claire considered Kim’s words. She’d forgotten Coca Cola. What if the assignment was for real?

Maybe I should start taking it a bit more seriously.

***